Let the healing begin. ✌️

Also, if anyone wants to attempt to cancel me, that’d really help my career. 🙏

#charliekirk #ericakirk #darkjokes #comedian #standup

I'm excited to see him not answer any of these and just WEAVE.

same same but different: suicide's martin rev, strokes' julian, comedy's tim dillon

Every time there’s an outrage cycle over a comedian’s words, I turn into some Col. Jessup of standup:

Did not know. Also, this makes even LESS sense somehow?

Canada should make this their flag

The algorithm is killing good art. We’re all making baby food here.

#art #creativity #comedian #artist #artinspiration

Is Gen Z ushering in sharia law!? A drunk heckler tries to help. What could go wrong?

Texans and drag queens

You want money to help COUNT VOTES? I swear, these pols are worse than junkies.

"These results are all because of Israel forcing us into a war with Iran." Um, Iran War started in Feb '26. 47 was already wildly unpopular then. But I get it, "blame Israel for everything" is the "get out of jail free" card for folks who got fooled by a con man.

I admire both sides for having this conversation. Meetings like this are the path forward if you actually desire peace. youtube.com/watch?v=chuJEH…

The idea that all these issues exist within a good/evil narrative feels overly simplistic. I don't have the energy to get into the nuance here, but I admire Haviv having this convo in an environment that shares your views. Worth a watch, I'd say. youtube.com/watch?v=chuJEH…

Saw this comment under another comedian’s joke. Masterful backhanded trolling going on here. 😜

I posted a bit re: Korea taking over America and it went viral – almost 800,000 views on IG so far. Then things got really weird...

I hope he wins but GOD ONLY KNOWS

It's the outsized obsession with Israel that feels off to many... "Authoritarian states (such as Saudi Arabia, Qatar, and the UAE) spend heavily on high-powered DC consulting firms, think tanks, academic institutions, and defense lobbying to shape policy."

Oh, good. Nice to see. This should work out great. Gulp.

Coming soon to FUNNY HOW Substack. Sign up at link below to get 'em in your inbox...

A man credibly accused of SA should NOT be in the US Senate… 🇺🇸

#comedian #standup #maine #election comedy

The worst thing you can see on the subway is… 😬

It's possible 47 believes he's a Don simply because his name is Don.

IG cares so much about shares. Terrible for comedy. This is the digital equivalent of clapter. “I want you to know that I approved this message” is for political ads, not comedy and art. Ugh.

I told them I had one that was too dark. They said let’s go.

Women: "I'm getting death threats."
IG: "We can't do anything about that."

Comedians: "This AI slop model stole my joke."
IG: "We can't do anything about that."

Record labels: "Some kid used our song in his Reel."
IG: [clip instantly taken down]

Me:

The only people on TV who feel like actual human beings

bird's eye view > everything else

L: PDF file, R: PDF file attachment

But there are so many ugly people out there. It can't be THAT insaneeeee...

The people are starting to catch up

Billy Corgan met his wife when she was 19!? Outrageous. Her frontal cortex wasn’t even fully formed yet. 🧠

#comedian #standup #comedy #agegap #billycorgan

Everyone waits until the last minute to buy tickets these days. I wanna complain about that, but I tend to do the same thing so… 🤷🏻‍♂️

"He said whaaaaaaat about Nicki Minaj' ass?"

my taping went great. truly amazing. and now it's me throwing out two years of material and starting all over again. sometimes ya gotta burn down the forest to let the new trees grow. onward.

Gonna start sending this with “up your alley!” as passive aggressive way to troll bk moms 😜

I did the opposite of EVISCERATE this heckler here: buff.ly/1TNZrsb

🎥 Live special taping • October 25 • NY Comedy Club (24th St)

🗯️ “Button-pushing…funny...a New York comedy institution.”
-NY Times

🗯️ “One of the smartest voices in standup right now.”
-Standupworld com

🦓🍑🤷‍♂️ buff.ly/Mz0Jmzf

👀

Mental health fit checks.

🎥 Live standup special taping • October 25 • NY Comedy Club (24th St) • 5 & 7pm

I'll get you up to speed.

🎥 Live special taping • October 25 • NY Comedy Club (24th St) • 5 & 7pm • promo code "groovy" for discount

Religion vs drugs

They wanna own the libs so fair is fair…

I'm 50/50 on this.

Building bridges.

SNL's James Downey, a Norm Macdonald collaborator, spoke about their mindset on Weekend Update: "What I did like about the way we approached Update was that it was akin to what the punk movement was for music: just real stripped down."

But he totally leaked how much he was against it to the NY Times in order to cover his ass for '28 so that's somethingggggg, right?

OG Anunobones

I guess fake news has been around for a while: "Emperor Nero did not play a fiddle while Rome burned, as the fiddle had not been invented yet."

I’ve hung out with enough burning man guys to know you should never trust a man who wears this many bracelets. 😜

Bono on defiant joy 🤌

me when some IG model has a ridic BBL:

He challenged what now?

Dreams do come true. 🍒🪢

🎥 Live special taping • October 25 • NY Comedy Club (24th St)

“Oh my gawd , Becky. Look at his butt. It is so big.”

You're not gonna believe who thought I was too polite with a heckler...

How to joke about gender without sounding misogynistic. 🤍🤍🤍

#SNL #comedy #comedian #standup #nyc

All this talk re: tight shorts reminds me of "The Underwear Mix-Up" on Three's Company.

This pov from a feminist philosophy professor rocked my world years ago: Neoliberal corporatism wears the mask of mainstream feminism in order to legitimate its vast upward redistribution of wealth and advance a predatory, winner-take-all form of capitalism!? Mind bloooooown.

The w-word gets a promotion.

#SNL #comedy #comedian #standup #language

You can hate *that* joke, but I fear the result of this discourse is a chill on comedians going after third rail topics.

Ones that attack BS on all sides.
Like the comics I love most told.
If you want to laugh and keep wondering why comedy seems geared toward idiots...
my standup is for you.

No crowdwork.
I don't care what you do for a living. I have ideas.
No roast jokes.
Insulting celebrities is just another form of worshipping them.
No clapter.
I don't want Bushwick to applaud me for saying the approved point of view.

next press secretary

“New to me” terms…

Def more meat on the bone here lol

Wrote about Andrew Scott talking about the phrase “openly gay” during an actors roundtable conducted by The Hollywood Reporter and how it came out like a perfectly formed standup bit.

RIP. Also: Not sure this is on me. We need to stop saying “do better” about everything. It’s time we all…well, y’know.

Big Pharma, the news, and the Cornell 7. // #comedian #standup #comedy #pharma #cornell

Great minds...

Manosphere really got these boys thinking gay. Clavicular and the Cornell 7, besides being heinous, should totally set off your gaydar. The former is just doing Chelsea gym shtick for tweens. As for the frat boys, how many 🍆s you need in the room to get off, fellas?

Spielberg really shoulda ended "Jaws" with this...

Macarons de Saint-Émilion 🤌 – created by Ursuline nuns since 1620! Love the packaging too.

All this true crime leading to paranoia. 🧐🕵️‍♀️

I don't understand these kinds of comments. YOU don't like the jokes. Fine. But when the guy consistently kills with these jokes in other rooms, it seems clear that's a subjective opinion. I know that's what we do online but it still feels so weird to comedians. We have the data.

Seems like he's doing alright outside of Austin too

Belt buckle GOAT

does every band need to dress like GWAR goes to the circus now?

Almooooost there. We just need it sponsored by Tostitos.

online comments always such a split decision

Is being really good at *anything* a form of mental illness?

same same but different

yer boy in Entertainment Weekly

NYC: If you only see me do one show this year, make it this one. Will be the best of the best of my jokes. Ticket link below with discount code.

Stellar emoji work here I gotta say

Comedians are getting replaced by Sebastian Maniscalco and a Kardashian clone: "SiriusXM’s Raw Dog shakeup puts the squeeze on working comics while AI-slop hotties prove joke theft is a lucrative business."

A nerd fraternity that s*xually assaults women? So basically we're living out the plot to "Revenge of the Nerds."

Times have changed. Mulaney used to stand like an actual clown.

The nerve

The lesson here is clear: More comedians need to get BBLs. Give the people what they want! [Hops on plane to Rio.]