Uber Eats

@UberEats

Sep 8

6ɪx✦

@6ixxtar

Sep 7

The guy who delivers our groceries has started leaving little notes on the bags, except they're all very ominous and poetic? Like the first one said "The apples were soft. I chose differently for you. Trust is circular." And I was like okay, weird, but he did get better apples than I would've picked so maybe he's just really into fruit.

But then it kept happening. "Three avocados. Past, present, future. One will betray you." Or "The milk expires Friday but don't we all." One time he left a note that just said "They didn't have your brand of salsa. I have made a choice you will understand only in time."

My husband thinks it's hilarious and has started leaving notes back. Like "Thank you for the bananas. Your wisdom travels with us." They've never met, just this ongoing weird note exchange on our doorstep.

Last week the delivery guy left a bag with a note that said "I have been transferred to a new zone. Another will come. Speak not of me." And I was like oh no this is kind of sad actually? I didn't realize I cared but I did?

The new delivery person showed up yesterday. Very normal, very efficient, no notes. Just groceries. It felt empty.

But then I unpacked everything and at the bottom of the last bag there was a single note that said "Greg briefed me on your journey. The eggs are fragile. As are we all."

My husband wants to invite them to Thanksgiving.