Delivery fee is where I decide if I really want that thing or not

So you’re telling me a car learnt how to do a backflip before I could?

Can we delete twitter views I don’t need to see how many people ignored me

Having that one leg out of the blanket will really cool your whole body down

It's crazy how you can remember a random moment from 10 years ago but not why you walked into a room

I hate knowing that I’m in the background of a strangers picture and I will never get to see it

I’m only trying to spend $25 from now until December tbh

Just because you don’t cheat, doesn’t mean you’re a good gf/bf

I don't miss you at 2am .. I miss you when life gives me a win & I can't tell you

I can’t stand when people make me feel like I’m crazy or I’m tripping when I know I’m making the most sense

car rides by yourself with loud music is so therapeutic

Pretending you don’t see people staring at you is a real skill

My ability to “read the room” is half the reason I don’t like going places

It bothers me that there are so many songs I don’t know about that I might like

Idk how to explain it but oct, nov, dec are basically fri, sat, sun

I hate when I realize I told someone too much

No victim here. I’ll say what I did, why I did it and stand on it

people will secretly learn from you, then act like you never influenced them

I wonder how people would react if I walked into Sea World holding a fishing rod

My toxic trait is that I will restart the entire song if you talk over it